Conflict Resolution Training

The worst clause in international contracts? “Mediation first, arbitration next.” Sounds reasonable, looks friendly, and feels balanced. Until your client loses 12 months in procedural deadlock while the other side burns cash and leverage. Dispute resolution is not about fairness. It is about speed control. — Who benefits from delay? — Who survives procedural fatigue? — Who controls the narrative during that time? In cross-border deals, I rarely leave it open. “Mediation shall be initiated within 10 days of notice and completed within 30 days. If unresolved, either party may proceed directly to arbitration.” Something like this saved one of my clients a ton of legal fees. Because contracts are not about preventing conflict. They are about controlling what happens when conflict is inevitable.

Conflict is inevitable. How we manage it is both an art and a science. In my work with executives, I often discuss Thomas Kilmann's five types of conflict managers: (1) The Competitor – Focuses on winning, sometimes forgetting there’s another human on the other side. (2) The Avoider – Pretends conflict doesn’t exist, hoping it disappears (spoiler: it doesn’t). (3) The Compromiser – Splits the difference, often leaving both sides feeling like nobody really wins. (4) The Accommodator – Prioritizes relationships over their own needs, sometimes at their own expense. (5) The Collaborator – Works hard to find a win-win, but it takes effort. The style we use during conflict depends on how we manage the tension between empathy and assertiveness. (a) Assertiveness: The ability to express your needs, boundaries, and interests clearly and confidently. It’s standing your ground—without steamrolling others. Competitors do this naturally, sometimes too much. Avoiders and accommodators? Not so much. (b) Empathy: The ability to recognize and consider the other person’s perspective, emotions, and needs. It’s stepping into their shoes before taking a step forward. Accommodators thrive here, sometimes at their own expense. Competitors? They might need a reminder that the other side has feelings too. Balancing both is the key to successful negotiation. Here’s how: - Know your default mode. Are you more likely to fight, flee, or fold? Self-awareness is step one. - Swap 'but' for 'and' – “I hear your concerns, and I’d like to explore a solution that works for both of us.” This keeps both voices in the conversation. - Be clear, not combative. Assertiveness isn’t aggression; it’s clarity. Replace “You’re wrong” with “I see it differently—here’s why.” - Make space for emotions. Negotiations aren’t just about logic. Acknowledge emotions (yours and theirs) so they don’t hijack the conversation. - Negotiate the process, not just the outcome. If you’re dealing with a competitor, set ground rules upfront. If it’s an avoider, create a low-stakes way to engage. Great negotiators don’t just stick to their natural style—they adapt. Which conflict style do you tend to default to? And how do you balance empathy with assertiveness? #ConflictResolution #Negotiation #Leadership #Empathy #Assertiveness #Leadership #DecisionMaking

Workplace conflicts cost U.S. companies $359 billion annually, affecting 85% of employees. The interesting part is that teams that avoid conflict may seem harmonious on the surface, but often suffer from simmering tensions and reduced psychological safety. Workplace clashes are inevitable, but they don't have to be destructive. Here's 𝗛𝗢𝗪 to transform conflict into a tool for growth and innovation: 𝟭. 𝗙𝗼𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗻 𝗗𝗶𝗮𝗹𝗼𝗴𝘂𝗲: → Create a safe space where everyone feels heard and valued. → Encourage non-emotional discussions, even when challenging. 𝟮. 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗲 𝗘𝗺𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵𝘆: → Encourage diverse perspectives and active listening. → Build trust by understanding individuals' experiences and intentions. 𝟯. 𝗔𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗲 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗕𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀: → Approach situations with a service mindset and human kindness. → Seek to understand rather than blame, focusing on shared goals. 𝟰. 𝗧𝗮𝗹𝗸 𝗧𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗴𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗧𝗲𝗮𝗺: → Regularly address challenges to prevent frustration and resentment. → Create open communication channels for voicing concerns and suggestions. 𝟱. 𝗙𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗺 𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻 𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗱𝘂𝗮𝗹 𝗲𝗳𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘁: → Emphasize shared values and objectives. → Frame goals and solutions in terms of team wins. What are your experiences with conflict in the workplace?  Share your thoughts in the comments below! #leadership #conflictmanagement #workculture #teambuilding

When a team member jumps to an angry conclusion. You notice the change in body language. Defenses are raised. People either shut down or attack. The situation blocks constructive conversation. Last night I had a great session about conflict with my Executive cohort at NYU School of Professional Studies. We exchanged ideas on preparing for inevitable conflicts at work—how to show up with intention instead of reacting on autopilot. Here’s what stuck with me: ✔ Preparation starts before the conflict. Deep breathing can regulate your nervous system. One slow inhale can stop a bad reaction before it starts. Prepared phrases to de-escalate, set boundaries, and increase understanding. ✔ Body language matters. Open posture. Uncrossed arms. Calm eyes. Signals safety instead of threat. ✔ Your voice is a tool. Lower tone. Slow pace. Don’t match the other person’s energy—reset the room with your own. ✔ Micro-pauses buy clarity. A one-second pause gives your brain time to think. It helps you respond instead of react. ✔ Lead with validation. Try: “I can see this is frustrating.” It doesn’t mean you agree. It means you’re listening. Conflict isn’t the problem. Unpreparedness is. If you want to build trust, show up prepared. #marketingleadership #conflict

I don't class conflict as a "waste" because not all conflict is bad...but unresolved conflict can be VERY wasteful in organizational improvement efforts. As a Lean and Leadership Coach, I have worked with companies to develop systems and skills to reduce harmful conflict, in order to make continuous improvement a reality. People ask me - how do you know there's conflict in the first place? Do we have to assess it in some way? Short answer yes. The problem has to be visible. My own approach is to ask questions that help me understand it through my 1:1 interviews as part of my Discovery phase. Here's what I (and many studies) see as the 5 of the main causes of workplace conflict...and how to resolve them 👇 👉 Communication Conflict: Studies have found that 39% of workplace conflicts arise from communication differences. I coached 'Joan' who told me that she and her direct report ('Jim') only interact when there's a problem. They both want the same results, but they don't spend time together proactively figuring out how to get them. Resolve it through: ✔️ Holding regular 1:1 and team check-ins ✔️ Reviewing communication and information flow as part of process improvement efforts ✔️ Improving meeting management 👉 Values Conflict: Research indicates that 18% of conflicts are due to clashing values. I see it in teams all the time- 'Mark' valued speed and 'Greg' valued precision. It turned into personal conflict as they were both too set on their own values, to try and understand where the other is coming from. Resolve it through: ✔️ Focusing on shared goals and common ground. ✔️ Respecting different viewpoints ✔️ Investing in people and leader development, to develop these skills in everyone. 👉 Resource Conflict: Studies found that 33% of workplace conflicts are due to too much work without enough support or a clash over differing cross- departmental priorities. A simple example- the Sales team rush orders to hit targets but Operations burns out trying to deliver. Resolve it through: ✔️ Being fair and transparent about resources. ✔️ Prioritizing tasks when resources are limited. ✔️ Working together to find creative solutions. 👉 Personality Conflict: One study found that a whopping 49% of workplace conflicts are attributed to clashes between personalities or egos. This comes down to how people behave, how they judge others and their level of EQ. Resolve it through: ✔️ Learning about different work styles. ✔️ Investing in personal development ✔️ Investing in team EQ development and team bonding 👉 Role Conflict: Unclear roles and responsibilities can cause confusion and disputes. Approximately 22% of workplace conflicts is said to stem from unclear roles. Resolve it through: ✔️ Clearly defining roles and responsibilities. ✔️ Reviewing job duties regularly and using them in 1:1's. ✔️ Discussing and fix any role overlaps. How should we be dealing with conflict in our organizations? Leave your thoughts below 🙏

Drafting Dispute Resolution Clauses for US Jurisdiction These clauses are a strategic roadmap for managing conflict, crucial for saving time, money, and stress if a disagreement escalates. The approach of a lawyer should centre on efficiency and control. The focus should be on resolving issues quickly and cost-effectively, while giving the clients a degree of predictability over the process. Good Faith Negotiation This is the simplest and cheapest, aiming for a direct resolution between the parties. One should specify who (e.g., senior management) should be involved and set a clear timeframe, like 30 days, to ensure prompt action. Mediation If negotiation falters, we move to non-binding mediation. A neutral third-party mediator facilitates discussion, helping find common ground. It's confidential, less formal than court, and often successful, focusing on settlement rather than legal victory. We usually split the mediator's costs and set a timeframe, perhaps 60 days. Binding Arbitration If mediation fails, arbitration is the next step. Here, a neutral arbitrator (or panel) makes a final, binding decision, much like a judge. This is chosen for its speed, privacy, and generally lower cost compared to litigation. When drafting, it's important to: *Explicitly state it's "final and binding." *Reference established rules, like those from the American Arbitration *Association (AAA) or JAMS, to provide clear procedures. *Define the number of arbitrators (one is often quicker). *Specify the location (venue) for arbitration. *Include waivers for jury trials and class actions, as these rights are typically given up in arbitration. #agreements #arbitration

Ever dreamed of being in a nice and harmonious team? It might be your biggest nightmare. Clients have approached me to find out how they can stop people from being too nice! In many Asian cultures, interdependence and harmony are highly valued. Teams often prioritize agreeableness and cohesion. This creates a supportive work environment. It also leads to challenges like groupthink and innovation stagnation. Problems are not found out early enough. People drag their feet raising critical problems. Agreeable individuals are typically - cooperative - empathetic - prioritize positive relationships. They can result in an avoidance of conflict. Especially if they are unskilled in conversation. This prevents teams from engaging in productive debates essential for innovation and problem-solving. Most people also misunderstand conflict. It does not mean taking out weapons and killing one another. It merely means anything that might be uncomfortable. Even an extravert speaking with an introvert can create some discomfort. One must be willing to hold the space to such interactions. They force you to reconsider long-held (possibly outdated) mental models. Here is the "Harmony Challenge": 🔸 Avoidance of Conflict The avoidance style of conflict management is often associated with increased employee turnover and dissatisfaction. 🔸 Groupthink High levels of agreeableness can lead to groupthink, where consensus often creates inefficiency and poor decision making. 🔸 Reduced Innovation Without conflict to challenge ideas, teams may struggle to innovate or adapt to changing environments So, how do we find the right balance between harmony and constructive conflict? ✅ Encourage Constructive Conflict Training team members in constructive conflict resolution skills can help them engage in healthy debates without damaging relationships. ✅ Diverse Team Composition: Including team members with varying levels of agreeableness can introduce different perspectives and reduce the risk of groupthink. ✅ Leadership Interventions Leaders can foster an environment where dissenting opinions that make sense are valued, and seen as opportunities rather than threats to harmony. If you have too agreeable a team, you will need to build their conversational intelligence in order to balance respectful dissent within your team. I have written about this previously in my LinkedIn Newsletter on Bulletproof Leadership, which I am happy to leave open to critique. https://lnkd.in/gCKNeG3i Meanwhile, as an organizational psychologist, I'm engaging with forward thinking organizational leaders who see the need to grow this new muscle in a time where many wellbeing initiatives seem to only enhance harmony without the subtle balance. Reach out - I'll be happy to share my views in a coffee conversation!

⚖️ Arbitration vs Mediation vs Civil Suit – Choosing the Right Path to Resolve Disputes. In today’s fast-paced world, disputes are inevitable – whether in business, property, contracts, or personal relationships. But how we resolve them can make a huge difference in terms of time, cost, and outcome. Three common dispute resolution methods are Arbitration, Mediation, and Civil Litigation. While all serve the purpose of justice, they differ significantly in approach and impact. 🔹 Arbitration – A Private Courtroom Arbitration is like having a private judge. The parties choose an arbitrator (or a panel), present their evidence, and receive a binding award. It is more flexible and faster than courts but still formal in nature. ✅ Best suited for commercial and contractual disputes, especially cross-border transactions. 🔹 Mediation – Dialogue & Settlement Mediation focuses on collaborative resolution. A neutral mediator facilitates discussions, helping parties reach a mutually agreed settlement. It is confidential, cost-effective, and preserves relationships. ✅ Ideal for family disputes, workplace conflicts, and business negotiations. 🔹 Civil Suit (Litigation) – Formal Justice System Litigation is the traditional way – filing a case in court and letting a judge decide. It follows strict legal procedures and provides binding decrees. However, it is often time-consuming, expensive, and public. ✅ Best suited for property disputes, recovery suits, tort claims, and cases requiring enforceable judgments. 🔑 Takeaway Arbitration = Private, binding, faster than courts. Mediation = Voluntary, cooperative, preserves relationships. Civil Suit = Formal, enforceable, but lengthy and costly. 👉 The choice depends on the nature of the dispute, urgency, and the relationship between the parties. Businesses often prefer arbitration; families lean towards mediation; and complex legal rights usually go through litigation. ✨ Final Thought Dispute resolution is not just about winning a case – it’s about finding a fair, practical, and sustainable solution. The right choice can save time, money, and relationships. #Arbitration #Mediation #Litigation #CivilLaw #DisputeResolution #LegalAwareness #CorporateLaw #ADR #Justice #LinkedInLaw

In leadership, avoiding conflict often leads to unvoiced tensions and unresolved issues, which can create a vicious cycle of mistrust and overcompensation. When leaders and team members shy away from difficult conversations, they may feel the need to overperform—to prove their competency and safeguard their reputations. ⚠️ The Issue: This overperformance isn’t sustainable. Without transparent conversations and a willingness to address conflicts head-on, team members can become mistrustful, leading to disengagement and ultimately burnout. The fear of reputational threat looms large, driving a cycle of exhaustion and inefficiency. 💬 The Solution: Leaders must adopt a skills-based conflict resolution approach to break this cycle and to foster a culture of open, transparent communication. When team members feel safe to voice their concerns and have the tools to productively engage conflict, they can work more authentically and effectively. This frees up time to focus on outcomes and impact. 👥 Your Next Step: Are you seeing signs of overperformance, conflict avoidance, or burnout, in your team? Your team may need to develop some new skills to effectively engage one another. Let’s connect to explore how adopting a skill-based conflict resolution approach can transform your team dynamics. 🔗 #Leadership #ConflictResolution #BurnoutPrevention #OpenCommunication

🚨 Project Management Myth #10 – Be sure to avoid conflict! Early in my project management career, several people gave me advice to avoid conflicts. Even to this day, I occasionally hear this claim. In project management, conflicts naturally occur as the complexity and scope of projects increase. Avoiding conflict is also something I see done by some project managers. In general, many people I see who shy away from conflicts seem to be polite introverts. However, there is a big problem with avoiding conflicts, as this does not always solve the issue. 🫤 Sometimes, conflicts may fizzle out. But many times, conflicts will become more intense. In addition, many conflicts which appear to “fizzle out” are still there, under the surface. If they ever come back up again, the intensity is often much worse. 💣 Rather than ignoring conflict, I recommend nipping them in the bud by addressing them early with conflict resolution best practices. 👍 Here is 1 method I use to resolve conflict. It’s called the SLAP method, as shared by Brad Egeland. ✅ STOP – When the environment is not conducive for healthy project progress, it’s time to acknowledge the issue and talk to the team or any team members involved. 🛑 ✅ LISTEN – Hear each side of the conflict and seek to understand. Don’t show any favoritism. Listen to each person without interrupting or allowing them to interrupt others. 👂 ✅ ANALYZE / ADDRESS – Ask yourself questions such as: What are the issues? Are they legitimate? Can they easily be solved? ❓❓❓ ✅ PUSH ON – Once you understand the situation, then you either push the solution you think is best or you can seek collaboration by proposing potential solutions that you see and invite the team to add to those and weigh in. Each situation is different. Some conflicts may need a more authoritarian approach if there will never be team agreement. But in general, I like to try the collaborative approach first. That gets buy-in from the team and usually leads to better productivity moving forward. 📈 Have you ever heard this opinion before regarding conflicts, especially with project management? What was the context and how did you respond? 🤔 Please share your experiences and examples in the comments! Also, if you have another conflict management method that works well for you, please share! We can all learn from one another. _________________ 🔔 Ring the bell to follow me on LinkedIn for topics on #projectmanagement, #programmanagement, #pmo, #businesstransformation, #careertips, and #leadership, as well as the rest of this series! #projectmanager #programmanager #businessanalysis #businessanalyst #projectmanagementprofessional #projectmanagerskills #conflictmanagement #conflictresolution